I had this experience a couple of weeks ago and when it happened it stopped me in my tracks as if I was being specifically spoken to by the Lord. Almost in an awakened startling way. In a good much needed way though.
It was Friday and a school day, and I hurriedly got the kids in the car around 6:30 AM. It was freezing cold maybe in the teens for the umpteenth day in a row, and we were on our way to school. I remember the week had flown by. Lots of work little of me even littler (I know that's not a word!) of me and my kids.
The usual things I did before working like studying all weekend with W on his spelling words so he knew them by Tuesday for his Friday test had gone by the wayside. I was frustrated. The times I did check W's folder I had found a few bad grades on things he could have had a 100% on had mom (me!) taken the time to help him.
I was starting to get....angry. Not at anyone in particular just angry.
It was still dark and we were leaving for school. After being in the car about 10 minutes I realized it was Friday and I had not studied one single time that week with my 7 year old. *Gulp* I asked W to pull out his word list and hand it to me while I was driving. I called out a few words and.... he misspelled them all. I started to feel all sorts of anxious and not just because of the misspelled words. Because of....everything. I felt like a mommy explosion (putting that nicely but it is in no way nice) was about to erupt any second. I was trying to stay calm. I called out another word...and he misspelled another word. That was it. I knew in the next millisecond it was all going to spew. I couldn't contain it any longer. It was like slow motion. I could see the disappointment in his little face in the rear view mirror. I could feel the yelling, nagging, tears, stress tsunami about to come right out of me. He knew it was going to come too so he turned his head and looked out the window.
That's when it happened. As the sun was coming up and during a beautiful cold sunrise-
W yelled in the most happy whimsical little boy voice- "A SKUNK!"
We were at a stop sign by this gorgeous piece of land along the railroad tracks that we pass every morning and afternoon. It is a brown rustic wooden cabin surrounded by 6 acres of gorgeous land for sale for $700,000 (we pass the billboard everyday twice a day). There is an old brown wooden fence surrounding the property, and we were sitting there at the stop sign nanoseconds before my eruption.
I turned my head and saw W looking in awe at the cutest fluffiest most alive skunk we had ever seen while riding in the car that was trotting across the 6 acres of open land. The skunk had a long way to go to get to the wooded area he was heading for so we all froze and watched him. I too felt mesmerized by his aliveness!
W commented, "I've never seen a skunk alive before!"
M was cooing, "awwwwww, he so cuuuuuute!"
And he was.
He was cute and very much alive.
He also was a much needed distraction to the small frustrations in my life that had my emotions all tangled in a big huge tangled mommy stress knot.
The wonder in my little boy's voice. The novelty of such an out of place piece of nature that froze us in our tracks in pure joy was much welcomed.
That adorable skunk gave me the time I needed so God could say clearly to me, "It's going to be ok. This is not a big deal. Take a deep breath."
That's exactly what I did. The rest of the way I did not blow up. When we crossed the railroad tracks a gorgeous sunrise was still in action, and I made sure I took time and pointed it out. I used my vast knowledge of phonemic awareness to help W with the words. Relating each one he didn't know in some way to one he did.
He made a 100% on his test.
A few days later I realized the day before the Valentine's party that my sign up genius I sent to all of the 2nd grade parents in W's class had not sent me any emails saying parents had signed up for the brunch items on it. I checked it the day before and.....it never posted! So with the help of two other moms we pulled together the brunch that evening. No big deal. The next morning I baked and left extra early. I got to school in plenty of time to decorate W's classroom for the party and unload food before my kids arrived for class. While enjoying all the decorating another teacher said my phone had been ringing in the hallway. It was Paul calling to tell me I had his keys....and mine. My kids were going to be in my room in 15 minutes, and it was a 25 min drive home. I looked at the clock and realized Paul was going to inevitably be late for W's Valentine Program and miss most of it. On the way home I almost cried. I was so stressed. Then I thought I saw something flurry on my windshield. It looked like a flower petal, but it was snow-it began to snow the moment I contemplated crying. It was so beautiful. It started pouring snow but not sticking to the ground. A beautiful distraction again just when I needed it. When I returned to class only about 30 minutes late there were Valentine's gifts all over my desk.
Fastforward to this week. I have been working for nearly two months now. I've survived volcano projects, conferences to meet parents, reading running records, a Valentine's party, a field trip, and teaching in general. I have enjoyed it, but it has not come without that old feeling of tension, stress, a need for coffee, chocolate, and Dr. Pepper.
My fuse has become shorter because the list in my brain is 1,000 times longer now when I'm at home. And right when I feel like I'm going to erupt....God sends me an ice storm! A much coveted snow day that turned into 2 then 3!!
It gave me the time I needed to sort out my own stress. To read. To play. To literally get myself together.
To be the mom I love to be.
It gave us a very unexpected renewal of our sense of wonder.
My kids asked if I was going somewhere today....because I took a shower! I said, "No, I'm just tired of stinking!" I actually took time to groom my eyebrows today because I had time...and it took scissors, no joke.
So all in all. This is it-God knows what we need and exactly the right moment WHEN we need it even when we don't. Even if it's a lone skunk trotting through an open field in the exact nanosecond a distraction is needed.
Even if it's a snow storm/wonderland:
Even if it's a 3 day time out :) Well....Make that a 4 day! I just got THE text-the no school tomorrow text!! It looks like I may even catch up on the laundry.
or snow!
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